The relationships we build with people are the foundation of our social lives. We learn to appreciate the people that are in our lives. People that come into our lives are either a lesson or a blessing, and in our twenties, we start to notice the value of our parents, significant others, and friends, and how the relationships with these people change over time.
We may have thought that some relationships, or certain types, are left behind in middle school or at least high school, but it somehow manages to follow us into our adult lives. We enter the world of adulthood when we get into our 20’s. But that doesn’t mean that everyone has matured into a civil human being 100 percent of the time.
Relationships are a big part of our lives, and when we get to this stage of life, this is where most of us find our significant lover or our best friends that we have always wanted. But it also comes with broken hearts and toxic friendships.
Our early twenties is still the prime of our social life, as we are still in college, but it seems to disintegrate as we grow older when we become more involved in 47 hour work weeks and our own families. What we look for in people change as we go on in life and relationships become more permanent, rather than temporary.
Paso High alumnus Zara Khan, who graduated in 2010, can testify to this, “staying in touch requires a lot of work. You don’t live down the street from friends or live in the same dorm anymore. Keeping in touch requires actual work, and with limited time, you’re forced to prioritize who adds value to your life and who makes you a priority too.”
The standards of commitment change, especially with significant others.
People stop looking for a simple fling and start looking for someone they can see themselves marrying. Instead of acting like kids, we start thinking of having kids. It’s crazy to think this, but it does happen. Instead of having sleepovers, we look for someone to move in with. The standards of commitment slowly start to become higher and more permanent.
But the relationships we have with people aren’t always formed with the help of schools, teams or past history. It can be made by sharing the same goals, beliefs and life paths.
“Make sure you both express yourselves and understand each other’s views, goals and aspirations. We are each other’s best friends, and we set goals together,” said alumnus Vicki Delgado, who graduated in 2010, and has been in a relationship with her now husband for 7 years.
Our relationships with our parents change. They stop paying for things, and that’s when you start having to do things on your own, rather than being dependent on them. We start to notice where our parents used to come from. In our early twenties we make that jump from the nest and try to be completely independent from them, and we start to realize that our parents only want the best for us and will always be there for you no matter what and gain a better understanding of each other.
“When you were younger, you dreaded talking to them, but now they’re the best listeners you’ll have,” Kylie McConville said, a writer for Elite Daily, “they’ve done more than you’ll ever be able to explain.”
As we grow older we learn to appreciate thepeople close to us. We learn who are our real friends and who were just temporary. We notice the qualities we look for in people and the ones we don’t. Our twenties is the time to figure this out. It’s a time to better our relationships with others that continues throughout life.